While going developing an article on "writing proposals and CVs". A question came up about if its right to blow one's own trumpet.
Question was:
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Is it a good practice to always speak good about oneself? If yes, then how do you do it without seeming proud?
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Its not a crime being proud of oneself
"Its awkward not to speak well of oneself... not to give personal appraise." Those are the words of Mr. Patrick Olakunle, saying it's important that we speak well of oneself always. When asked if this won't translate to one being perceived to be proud, he said: "Then its not a crime being proud of oneself. I couldn't agree more.
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Modesty is key
"I'd say modesty is key. If it contributes to the point one is trying to make, then it's fine. But if not, there is nothing more repelling than being too full of oneself." - Lawrence Idowu (University of Lagos, Nigeria)
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Combination of Speaking Good and Acting Good
"Speaking good of oneself is a good virtue when it is done with all sense of courtesy and honesty; acting good about what one has spoken about is itself a better idea; yet, nothing beats the skillful combination of the duo" - Bello Idris Olakunle (Ikorodu, Lagos; Nigeria)
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You cannot give what you do not have
"Most atimes we confuse confidence for arrogance but it's not supposed to be so. Most times what i say to people is, you cannot to give what you don't have" - Solomon David (Jos, Nigeria). Solomon also said:
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Occassion should determine?
"Even the Holy Bible states it, ‘Love thy neighbors as thyself'. This literally means you can’t love you neighbor if you do not love yourself hereby stamping what I said!. Occasionally, its gud 2 blow one's trumpet" says Bibi Olisa (Lagos, Nigeria). Here's the convo that ensued:
Ayoola: "Not every time, right?"
Ayoola: "When's the good time and when is the bad time?"
Bibi: "2 me dias no gud n bad time ok? Though i beliv in d road 2 success? Mistakes happen,so after d mistake? Wen u hit d jackpot? Blow ur trumpet den. Lemme give u an example: recently Linda ikeji built half a billion naira house. It ws all over d place,now after d pix wia splashed all over d place. She came out 2 talk abt her failed attempts,trials,hw wen she ws 30yrs had nothing 2 her name n she had 2 pray 4 direction 4rm d Almighty. She listened,she worked hard n 2day,she is known n recognised as a celebrity blogger,infact d 1st 2 enter d Nigerian market"
Bibi: "She also said somtin, she ws talkn 2 all young ladies not 2 believe dat dia body shud b traded 4 money,she said 2 work hard=-d"
"Back to ur qstn? Well..."
"D gud time 2 blow ur trumpet is wen u av a story(a geniue story) to tell behind d glory"
"D bad time as u put it, not 2 blow ur trumpet? Is wen u r in d training school of life's hardships"
"I hope av bin able 2 ansa ur qstn?"
Ayoola: "As a matter of fact, you have 'overanswered' :). That's a wonderful contribution right here."
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Does Temperaments matter?
"Cholerics and Melancholics have similarities. Once you know a person's temperament/personality trait, you can have more insight as to why they come across as proud..Or why the always speak about their achievements etc... I don't think there's anything wrong in speaking good about one's self, if people won't u might as well blow your own trumpet..As long as u do it in a subtle way, and not in a vain condescending way..A doze of pride is needed in every human being, we all have to be proud of ourselves irrespective of how small/big our achievements, success through the journey of life is...." - Folayemi Pikuda (Ibadan, Nigeria)
She also said:
"Also people will always misconstrue talking good about one's self as showing off..When u say i went to Harvard,i have a Msc,Phd,i worked in the UN and so on,if u are the type who is easily intimated,by other pple's achievements,accomplishments etc, u will conclude the person is proud/arrogant/a show off....I guess our approach,the tone we use,the manner in which we speak when speaking good about self is key.."
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Emmanuel Idenyi Shaibu (Jos Plateau State; Nigeria) supported Folayemi's view; he said: "You are right on this! Even the tone and manner used to speak still depends on temperament...but the truth is we are never completely one temperament there's a blend of others probably".
"Like me, you may have heard the popular advice 'don't blow your trumpet'. The truth is you have to blow your trumpet because if you don't, no one will do that for you."
"Also, if you don't, spiders will build their webs inside it."
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Spiders build their webs in idle trumpets
"It's our duty to craft our perception as perception is king". Those are the words of Nnamdi Okafor (Orlu, Imo State; Nigeria). I need to ask my "trumpeter" friend if it's true that if you don't blow your trumpet, spiders will build their webs in it. LOL
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Speaking about oneself is speaking to oneself
"When you speak good about ur self, you encourage yourself"
"You give yourself hope"
"And believe in yourself"
"If you don't see yourself as a great person, when you first start the journey, no one will see the greatness in you"
Those are the words of Banjo Oluwatobi (Sokoto, Nigeria)
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Also speaking about actions
"Through ur attitude towards ur dealings, behaviour and manner (genuinely) dats enough to speak about you, nt by words from u" - Mrs Okonu Funmi (Magodo, Lagos; Nigeria)
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What does your trumpet means and when should you blow it?
Ayo Olugbenga (Ibadan, Nigeria) came with an heart-melting comment. He was silently listening until he decided to voice his own opinion on the matter:
"Boss, I've been following this present series and gained a lot from the responses.
"On blowing one's own trumpet, these few points come to mind:
"1. You must have a trumpet: Hone a skill that you have and make it so shiny that showing it off is almost effortless. And then, the trumpet must be yours. Don't take credit for what is not yours. If a part of what you do is done by other(s), give credit. I think we learnt about giving credit on this platform earlier this year.
"2. If you've really got a trumpet, please blow it. There's nothing wrong in telling people you can speak four languages if you really can. If you paint excellently, don’t understate it when you tell people about it. As much as you don't want to be immodest, don't hide your candle under the bushel."
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Adeitan Daini (Ogudu, Lagos; Nigeria) supported Ayo's contribution, saying:
"My thought exactly"
"If there's a trumpet to blow in the first place don't think it will amount to pride doing so as that is what it's meant for, to be blown, that is. Also no use hiding it & there's no modesty attached to it as the sound after being blown will be heard no matter how subtle it was blown. This guy makes sense"
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Blowing one's trumpet is useful in mentorship and leadership
Tolulope Ogundiji wrote: "On blowing one's trumpet, my few points
"It is essential dat we live our life for others. If you live your life for yourself, you live in vain, but if you live for others, you will live again; Just as it is said by the famous reggae master
"It is very essential and needful to blow one's trumpet if motivates others; But if it is going to demotivate or rather sound like arrogance, then one should avoid it”
"As a leader, it motivates subordinates if a leader blows his trumpet especially if a leader talks about his achievement in d field
"My boss taught me selling, she often talked about how she brought in hundreds of millions to d company
"Dat is my little contribution"
Here was my response: "Of course, we should not do anything to demotivate others. It's good that you noted that". Tolulope Ogundiji (Ibadan, Nigeria) is the current CEO, AvalancheNigeria.com
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No one will help you blow your trumpet
"IF YOU DON'T BLOW YOUR TRUMPET, NO ONE WILL!!!
"In the first place, how will people hear the sound of your trumpet or even know you own one if you don't blow it?
"After all, if we own a candle...we would lite it in the open & not hide it!
"If we own a car, we would drive it & not just park it. Neither would we get a driver except we are handicapped or if we've gotten to that A-class then we can get a driver(blower).
"For as long as our MUSIC don't sound NOISY to the people around us (i.e if we don't blow our trumpets in a complacent manner) then its ok to blow your trumpet.
"If the sound of your trumpet won't make the listeners strive to get one...please keep your trumpet!"
Aina Omotayo (Ogba, Lagos-Nigeria) is the CEO MOTHARYOR™ Clothing
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What’s your own thoughts on this? You may leave a comment, suggestions or contribution
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Is it a good practice to always speak good about oneself? If yes, then how do you do it without seeming proud?
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